Why the hell did this colossal, stupid yesterday came into existence in my freaking, dingy life?
Everything’s cluttered now.I really don’t know what to think of myself.First, was the great mass-destructive degradation they constantly throw up on me – that I was BLACK – skinned & ugly, and being ugly is my tremendous title (They said they were just kidding though, half-myself wanted to consider that they were just joking but half of me wanted to disagree.).Next, was my freaking, stupid and the-cause-of-my-quivering voice.It was nothing angelic, really (and of course, nothing to boast about) I was perfectly and obviously in agony.I want to accurately bang my head on the adobe wall in a 360 degree position and shatter my clothes to pieces or just precisely play dead.
So, Today was a bull’s-hit day.Everything’s to worry about! This happened during a time-consuming, practice at the computer room.I happened to belong on the Serenade” Team-just happened to. My heart was on its utmost intensity of pumping bloods (good thing, my veins didn’t pass out!) and breathing some air was rather difficult.I can sense that my hands were slightly wobbly and frosty that was, surely, the indication that I was anxious.It was always LIKE me and dejectedly, that wouldn’t alter. My superb (?) partner was a senior of mine.He was nice, I guess, but not nice, enough.He seizes a voice of I-don’t know.I dislike him but certainly not hate him.He was great (yeah~) for the first two minutes of my life.But, hell, did he do that!!
I’ll keep his identity a – himitsu.Okay, I won’t utter much nonsense here so I’ll go straight to the story.
He said that MY voice didn’t match his and that MY VOICE was tiny.Oh-puh- lease!! You can directly utter that I’m just so not your type of a partner and that my stupid voice sounds like a hissing green cobra.
I was thinking of replacing myself with someone else. I don’t care. I don’t desire to sing in the first place especially with someone as SPLENDID as him. Oh I can’t match his greatness~ duh.
For the millionth time the notion kept on racing outta my shrimp-like head as I listened to his masculine accent discussing with some groups on what variety of a song we’re going to sing because my voice were really tiny.
Shit! That “tiny” word defining my voice is just so over it!! So what if it was tiny? I already know that, myself, and reiterating it persistently will only aggravate me.
Now, I’m peeved, know what? I hate it.I’m not used to frown like this, at all.
That made me truly irritated!! The foolish cause of my midnight sulking!! It was my ugliest nightmare!! But, keeping it inside me, will, simply, twirl my lively existence towards turmoil.
Virtual Name: XIAO ♥
Age: ??
Birthdate: November 3
Location: GSC, Philippines
School: GSC SPED Integrated School
Sexuality: Heterosexual
Wishes
Hear Suju and SHINee sing in person
Apple Laptop
More people to tag my cbox
Sony Cam
New comments
Receive gifts from people anywhere
Special Force
Good grades especially in MAth
Cose bags
Learn Basic Japanese and Korean Lang.
Sweets
Thursday, February 5, 2009
My darkest nightmare
Why the hell did this colossal, stupid yesterday came into existence in my freaking, dingy life?
Everything’s cluttered now.I really don’t know what to think of myself.First, was the great mass-destructive degradation they constantly throw up on me – that I was BLACK – skinned & ugly, and being ugly is my tremendous title (They said they were just kidding though, half-myself wanted to consider that they were just joking but half of me wanted to disagree.).Next, was my freaking, stupid and the-cause-of-my-quivering voice.It was nothing angelic, really (and of course, nothing to boast about) I was perfectly and obviously in agony.I want to accurately bang my head on the adobe wall in a 360 degree position and shatter my clothes to pieces or just precisely play dead.
So, Today was a bull’s-hit day.Everything’s to worry about! This happened during a time-consuming, practice at the computer room.I happened to belong on the Serenade” Team-just happened to. My heart was on its utmost intensity of pumping bloods (good thing, my veins didn’t pass out!) and breathing some air was rather difficult.I can sense that my hands were slightly wobbly and frosty that was, surely, the indication that I was anxious.It was always LIKE me and dejectedly, that wouldn’t alter. My superb (?) partner was a senior of mine.He was nice, I guess, but not nice, enough.He seizes a voice of I-don’t know.I dislike him but certainly not hate him.He was great (yeah~) for the first two minutes of my life.But, hell, did he do that!!
I’ll keep his identity a – himitsu.Okay, I won’t utter much nonsense here so I’ll go straight to the story.
He said that MY voice didn’t match his and that MY VOICE was tiny.Oh-puh- lease!! You can directly utter that I’m just so not your type of a partner and that my stupid voice sounds like a hissing green cobra.
I was thinking of replacing myself with someone else. I don’t care. I don’t desire to sing in the first place especially with someone as SPLENDID as him. Oh I can’t match his greatness~ duh.
For the millionth time the notion kept on racing outta my shrimp-like head as I listened to his masculine accent discussing with some groups on what variety of a song we’re going to sing because my voice were really tiny.
Shit! That “tiny” word defining my voice is just so over it!! So what if it was tiny? I already know that, myself, and reiterating it persistently will only aggravate me.
Now, I’m peeved, know what? I hate it.I’m not used to frown like this, at all.
That made me truly irritated!! The foolish cause of my midnight sulking!! It was my ugliest nightmare!! But, keeping it inside me, will, simply, twirl my lively existence towards turmoil.